Narcissism lures us with gloved tentacles, and it's not just John Edwards who fell captive. Anytime we operate in the world with excessive self-interest, we are like the young man in mythology who falls in love with his own face, or the conceited queen in Snow White, whose worldview centers on her rivals because life is a perpetual beauty pageant.
Last week I watched Mr. Skeffington on Turner Classic Movies, which told the story about how beauty is only skin deep, and that selfishness is more shallow than that. Bette Davis powerfully portrays Fanny Trellis, whose beauty brings throngs of men into her presence -- even after she marries the dour Job Skeffington (played by Claude Rains) -- as she basks in their adoration. Fanny is cruel, selfish, and throws away the love of her husband and daughter as she pursues passion for her own face.
The story takes a twist when diphtheria ravages her face. She transforms into a ghoulish figure of eyeliner, mascara, face creams, and wigs as she childishly attempts to adorn an aged face. One crazy scene is when a ringlet falls from her head as a former suitor from her youth woos her again. Fanny soon learns that the cash-strapped suitor always wanted her because of her looks. Now he wants her for money.
Even those of us who call ourselves Christians can be choked by narcissism's gloved, but brutal grip. While we wag a finger at the Paris Hiltons of the world, shake our heads at the egotism of politicians (take your pick: Senators Barack Obama, John McCain, Hillary Clinton or former President Bill Clinton), and pooh-pooh the indulgences of the megarich and celebrities, what rages inside our own hearts? Are we narcissistic about our own religious practice? Is our concern for others based on our love for them and our understanding their inner brokenness? Or is our concern based on our own narcissistic standards of performance? When our pursuit of youth surpasses the needs of our children, who need our time, our direction and our example, are we living in vain?
I thought I understood beauty blossomed from within. Sure, Lord. I got this. Your word says in Proverbs 31: "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised." (NIV) But then I contracted Graves' disease, which later caused my eyes to bulge. I began to experience the truth of that verse! I'll never forget when a friend I had not seen in years could not believe it was me when he saw me. His surprised reaction stung. But it was a good thing. The memory of that encounter and others force me to submit to God's beautifying work inside me and give that the priority. Even if God heals me right at this moment, may I continue learning His beauty lessons.
Mirror, mirror on the wall, who in the land is fairest of all? Jesus...the image of the invisible God.
Judy Howard Ellis
Hey, Ju Ju
We are savoring all the reads on FD. We have been spending time in the evening with your stories and discussing them before bedtime. Thank you for sharing the essence of your heart through each story that we read.
James and Denita Bailey
Posted by: James and Denita Bailey | September 02, 2008 at 08:39 PM